Chicago Full Moon Hash

HHHi HHHashers:

See my calendar at www.brownbearsw.com/freecal/hashcal and my web site at HHHinChicago.com
Visitors and new hashers (virgins), we start meeting at the listed times and start hashing a half hour later. Time for a quick beer.
Anyone want off this list, email Horn-E at H3HornEH3 and it will be done.

Urban hashing in Chicago is returning with some differing conditions. Will advise as best as I know or check their web sites. Things keep changing and I am just getting out the best info I have at the moment. New hashers or visitors, because of the virus and lock down, many hashes are back yards or parks and laid back finishes. Lawn chairs might be advised. Visitors, we might have a spare. Life is what it is. We charge $5 or $6 for hash cash or BYOB. Hash cash money goes to beer. Thirstday H3 and Chicago Hash are closed due to Covid.
Wed, Nov. 25, 2020, 7:00 PM. The Whiskey Wednesday Hash. Double Meter Beater will hare from Palmer Square Park near the middle of the park near 2200 N. Whipple. $0 Hash cash but contributions welcome if you want some beer also. Or BYOB. We haven't run this area in quite some time.

Sun. Nov. 29, 2020, 5:00PM The Chicago Full Moon Hash. Horn-E will lay trail from Mather Park at 5900 N. Francisco. Meet near the facilities. Last I heard is their might be some snow so lets get prepared for what the winter will bring us Covid Hashers. That means shorter circles probably and then ON Out. Time and circumstance will tell. And please note the start time. Lifa suggested we try 5:00PM because it is Sunday Night. And hopefully we will get some hashers on their way home from family trips who could use a good run. Now if we can only train the hare to lay one. Even I can't really remember running this area. So it will be a lot of new trail for everyone.

Covid Hashing Hareline
Tue, 1 Dec, 2020, The 4X2H4 Hash, Back Door Bizzle location needed
Sat, 5 Dec. 2020, The Big Dog Hash, Crotch Fire in the Palos Park Area, SW of Chicago. exact location needed.
Dec 15, Tue or Dec 16 Wed or Dec 17, The First Crack of the Moon Hash Hare & location needed. Contact Horn-E at H3HornEH3@aol.com
Dec 19, Sat. The Bushman Hash, Horn-E at Edgebrook Woods 1:00PM
Dec 29, Tue or Dec 31, The Chicago Full Moon Hash Hare & location needed. Contact Horn-E at H3HornEH3@aol.com
Dec 30, Wed The Whiskey Wednesday Hash Hare & location needed. Contact Horn-E at H3HornEH3@aol.com

My girlfriend came out of the shower and said "I shaved my pussy, you know what that means? I said "yeah, the drain is clogged again. "

The Tale of the Trail

Thu. Nov 19, 2020, A non-affiliated Covid Hash trail set by Cockholm Syndrome from under the tracks near Kinzie and Canal and 10 hashers seeking some good exercise managed to show up and run a fun trail with plenty of ups and downs. Damn hare. We took off to the east and across the river for a mixed up start and the pack somehow ended on Orleans St near the Merchandise Mart. Some went across the river and over to Wells. Some went in front of the Merchandise Mart. But we all managed to cross Wells and head over this little foot bridge to La salle. Here is where I lost the pack. Yes, again. I thought I saw Hooch B4 Cooch and Garmin heading east on Kinzie. Nope. So I ranged north on Clark looking for a trail going east. Not. Meanwhile, I think La Salle is where some found the ON Back trail and headed west. Whatever, Double Meter Beater managed to finish the trail in 25 minutes. but over achievers like him go back out to find the trail he missed. Some few hashers managed to find the correct the trail and keep going and get over towards the lake front for some of those up and downs especially around the rivers edge and lower Michigan. Meanwhile around Grand and Clark, Horn-E found the On back trail and followed it backwards. Hey, its trail. This led me straight east to Wabash where I missed a mark. Damn. But back on trail I ran a block north and crossed Michigan and got into some damn garbage filled alley. Now there I really needed to wear my mask and some nose plugs too. But it was up some stairs and further east and heading down some stairs I ran into Hooch B4 Cooch, Stiffy 4 Stiffies and the pack, at least what was left of it. So I followed them a bit and then, took a short cut to avoid that stinking alley and picked up on trail again with Hooch B4 Cooch and Garmin and we headed east. This was a zig zag trail through a bunch of alleys and streets until we finally hit the BN Check. I was in the lead here, and soon Lifa came along. I found trail along the river and we were soon heading back to the ON IN spot. And there was most of the pack. WTF. That included Steps In Shit and Pony Pounder. Eventually we were joined by the first DFLs Its Too Soft and Castration Frustration. And then came the second DFL, our misguided FRB, Double Meter Beater. Lifa led a bit of circle and all was good.

Sat Nov 21, 2020 was the Bushman Hash hared by Horn-E. Set to start at 1:00PM to avoid the early Forest closing of 4:24pm. Damn rules. Unfortunately some didn't read my posting and get the message of the time change. So when I got to the start after setting trail there were just three hounds. WTF. And I carried a case of beer all that way for three hounds. And laid trail for over three hours. Oh well. I'm sweeping so lets get going. We headed out and after a few splits the mini pack was off and running woodland trails. And then they missed a Split. Somehow the Split was marked with two sticks to go left, but they went straight. Now who marked that Split. We did see Lifa's car, but no Lifa. We figured he came and took off on trail. Not. So after a correction, the pack headed for the river following Stuffin Muffin and with a long dry spell, the river was low and we were able to cross the tracks under the trestle and there was a Check. They headed left and middle and both were long Falses. Here is where I got my trail inspiration of the day. I noticed that with the low river there was actually a low river bank trail that was dry and under a high hill with 80 degree climb up and down. Had to do that. So eventually the pack found trail, with a hint from the hare to Magnetic Muff, to the right and nearer the tracks and through some good shiggy over logs and stuff and through formerly wet lands. There would be two more of that along trail. But along here Lower Wackiff got ahead and then at a three way fell behind. And the pack ran on, together and then apart and really regrouped at the bridge on Forest Glen Drive. A back Check and a hidden Check got them. But here we reversed trail and headed back on the north side of the river through some good thick shiggy and nice enough areas to actually run a bit. Past the golf course and finally to that planned drop down to the river's edge. And they all chickened out. Hey, if an 80 year old man with a back pack full of flour can do it, so can you. Not. Hell, it was fun laying it and doing it again. These are the things that make some trails greater then others. Trail actually went to a thick vine hanging down a fifteen foot drop to the rivers edge. Vines. Tarzan. Well, not really. But I ran along the river and the trail eventually narrows. It is either the river or a steep climb, about 25 feet almost straight up. But with a few small trees growing out of the side, it was a snap. Yeah, even for an old man. Shortly after we saw four hashers on the other side of the rover. A 2:00pm starting group. This included Slit Digger, who was the only one to climb down to the rivers edge and back up again. And Lifa, False Advertising and Zone 2. So we ran west and they ran east. We had some more nice woods trail and eventually we got to the B, at the bend in the river. It took Lower Wackoff about five minutes to find the beer, 25 craft beers, all different. And as we drank beer, we finally saw the rest of the pack, on the other side of the river. Still five minutes to beer. We then held a quick circle and had to leave to beat that damn 4:24 sunset. All was good. And it was a great day with sunshine and all in the woods. And we did see some strange animal. A tail less squirrel. I had more hair on my chin then the squirrel. We figured he was damn lucky and just managed to get away from Wylie.

I was masturbating today and my hand fell asleep - that's got to be the ultimate rejection.

On On
Horn-E

Swing Low and ON ON Horn-E

The Hash Hymn - sung world wide at the conclusion of hashes and for the hearing impaired.

Swing Low, Sweet Chariot

Swing low, sweet chariot, cuming four two carry me home,
Swing low, sweet chariot, cuming four two carry me home. (chorus)

I looked over Jordan and what did I see, cuming four two carry me home,
A band of Angels cuming after me, cuming four two carry me home,

If you get there, before I do, cuming four two carry me home,
Tell all my friends, I'm cuming two, cuming four two carry me home,

Some times the chorus is followed by humming and silent verses.
For more on this, visit HHHinChicago.com, Down Down songs section

HHHi HHHashers:

We used to live in Kingdoms ruled by Kings. Then we lived in Empires ruled by Emperors. Now we live in Countries

COVID HASHERS: That is those that want to keep hashing and have been the back bone of hashing in Chicago since March. Attendance this last weekend was 38. We obviously want to keep hashing. We are the ones who show up and so we are the ones who will decide how and when to keep hashing as conventions we decide on evolve. We are mainly Horn-E 72 Lifa 57 Garmin 43 Lower Wackoff 31 Some Crappy Name 29 Its Too Soft 28 Cockholm Syndrome 26 Berts Special Friend 25 Back Door Bizzel 23 Hooch B4 Cooch 22 Meat Inside Her 21 False Advertising 21 Stuffin Muffin 18 Steps In Shit 17 Stiffy 4 Stiffies 16 Saving Myself For Two Black Guys 16 Double Meter Beater 15 Magnetic Muff 15 Just Do Me Slowly 15 Castration Sensation 11 Pony Pounder 11. That is 542 hashes and counting. Besides this group there hasn't been 175 other hashes run or hared in Chicago. There are some that want to keep hashing that don't have 10 hashes yet. You are included with us. If we want hashing to continue in Chicago through the winter, it will be mainly up to us. Currently we are hash in Chicago. But we also have to step up and do the haring. Please volunteer when you can. As for everyone else, we are all adults. We understand why many of you have decided not to hash. That is your personal choice. We have decided we want to keep going, for the exercise and the camaraderie of others and maybe just to have someone to socialize with once a week. That is our choice. We welcome you all to come back when you want to and feel comfortable hashing with us.

The Tale of the Trail

Fri. Nov 13, 2020, The First Crack of the Moon Hash Lower Wackoff laid trail from 5100 N. Francisco and we had 12 hounds. Trail started out to the south and ultimately did a big sweep around to the west and back north and east in the park and finally to a BN at the home of our newest resident Crip, Just Do Me Slowly. And it will be months before she is back on trail. The beer stop was in the back yard and Berts Special Friend was the first hound in. By then the lame or bull shit hounds Horn-E and Menage A Twat were already there. Damn hounds, screwed up on trail again. Especially that damn old man. He actually went to a park a mile away and ran to the correct location and stumbled onto trail at BN. Just Do Me Slowly's mom came out and met the hash. She can't really be JDMS's mom. She doesn't look a day over 60. We then headed over to the start where we held a circle as usual and in the cold. We're getting used to it. Others on trail were Lifa, Pony Pounder, Castration Sensation, Some Crappy Name (No, it isn't something too crappy to mention. That is it), Meat Inside Her, Magnetic Muff, Stuffin Muffin, Its Too Soft and Garmin.

Sat. Nov 14, 2020, The Big Dog Hash Set by Hooch B4 Cooch from BlackHawk Park. As I was arriving, going down Blackhawk street, the pack got an early start and ran past me in the adjacent alley and I never knew it. So, it was 14 trail hounds. But as I arrived at the start Hooch B4 Cooch told me and I was soon in pursuit. I caught then at a Check at Ashland. Or at least the back of the pack. And we were off straight west and then wound our way north to North and then south to Milwaukee. Isn't Milwaukee about 90 miles north of Chicago. Where the hell am I? At this point I had fallen way behind Steps In Shit and Magnetic Muff and was running along with False Advertising. I saw Magnetic Muff to the Northwest and we followed to a Check at Damen where Its Too Soft was parked. I started a counterclockwise loop looking for marks and kept watch on Its Too Soft in case someone called on and he was off. And then he was off and On and I didn't see him leave. What else is new. But I found trail to the south on Damen and into Wicker Park and a Split. Unmarked so I checked out the park and nothing. So I assumed, and never assume with a hare, that the trail had to go west and would probably then head south. Being so damn far behind, I decided to range to the south and eventually pick up on trail. Donnie the Retard. Trail went west and then north. Meanwhile False Advertising was sucked along with my bad call and the two of us separately ranged off course and worked our way back to the start, I then ran backwards on trail until I ran into Double Meter Beater. So it was back to the start. And the pack trickled on in and even Zone 2 managed to find trail and now has bragging rights over False Advertising. Eventually a Big Dog Circle was held and with this big mob, we went On and ON. Then we hung out, On and On. And Hooch B4 Cooch kept reloading a coffee pot with hot cider.

Sun. Nov 15, 2020, The Chicago Hash, Hooch B4 Cooch again laid trail from Pulaski Park. (Just south of Blackhawk between Cleaver and Nobel)Pulaski Park at Blackhawk between /Cleaver and NobelPulaski Park. and for the third hash in a row, Horn-E was late. So I hid my bag in bushes and took off on trail. Running fast, for me, there was no way I would catch that list of speedsters, 8 trail hounds besides myself. Trail started out like a previous hash and so I had no trouble following and what wasn't marked was often obvious and I ran on to the south east, over the Kennedy and back over the Kennedy on Chicago. Then a loop to the south and over to Ashland and pretty much straight north from there and on in. And there they were and circle was over. That is how fast they were and how slow I was, even when I was running fast. The pack included Lifa, Garmin, Double Meter Beater, Stiffy 4 Stiffies, Cockholm Syndrum, Rusty Grundel, Pony Pounder and Some Crappy Name. And more hot cider flowed and we hung out in strong cold winds for well over another hour or so. Just having fun socializing.

My lesbian friend said that it's been so long since she made love to another woman, she didn't know if she'd remember how.. I told her not to worry, it's just like riding a dyke.

On On
Horn-E

Swing Low and ON ON Horn-E

The Hash Hymn - sung world wide at the conclusion of hashes and for the hearing impaired.

Swing Low, Sweet Chariot